Chapter 10.8: Graduation

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Emma: Please, fortune cube, make it make sense...

Emma: C'mon, this isn't helpful at all!

^ translation: "Your romantic future 
doesn't look very bright!"

Emma: Whatever... how can a cube know anything about this, anyway?

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From Petra's diary

The end of the semester is approaching, and the general consensus is that we can't wait for it to be over. As we promised, both Mike and I did our best to help Emy finish her homework on time, finding books and articles at the library for her, and proofreading her thesis. What she always insisted on doing herself, instead, is the thesis redaction, claiming that she felt guilty for having saddled us with even more work than we already had and that having someone else write her thesis wouldn't be exactly legal either.

She always tries so hard to always put on a smile, but we can all see how exhausted she is. I still think that, in the long run, trying to graduate this semester is the right choice for her. But seeing her like this now, I can't help but feel guilty for her, because I haven't been able to help her enough.

Petra: If you want, I have some time to help with your thesis. It would be funnier, right?
Emma: But you still have a lot to study too, and then-
Petra: I'm actually curious to see how that paragraph about the insulin response of the, um, hepafocytes ends!
Emma: It's the hepatocytes, they are the cells of the liver. Let's see, yesterday we got to...

I don't know if I can really be of much help, anatomy really isn't my subject, but with this expedient I can at least give her a hand in finding the information she needs in those huge books that have been crowding her desk for months now. And then, this way, it's easier to find a little interlude to chat a bit or even let out a few jokes here and there. Studying like this seems much less stressful to me, and I hope the same goes for her.

Petra: Ah, I get it now! That chapter seems really well written, even your supervisor will surely have nothing to complain about, you'll see!

I admit I couldn't wait to go to sleep when we finally decided to call it a day, or at least I did until Emy decided a tight hug was needed to wish me goodnight. 

Petra: …

Emma: Can I stay like this for a little while, please?

Petra: Sure, don't worry...

Don't get the wrong idea, Petra, don't get the wrong idea... Most likely she just wanted to thank me, that's all.

Petra: (whispering) Thank you so much for all your help. You really are a fantastic friend, you know?

Ouch... Well, it's not like I expected anything else, not rationally at least. Despite this, I'm afraid I let out a resigned sigh, which I sincerely hope she didn't notice, before wishing her goodnight again and finally letting gravity win as I let myself fall onto my bed.

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Somehow, the time for our finals arrived. We knew we did our best, but the doubt that it might not be enough remained. Will we really manage to pass the year and graduate?

And, suddenly, the exams were over. All we had to do was wait for the results, and hope for the best.

The end of the exams coincided with Harvestfest, thus we couldn't avoid thinking that...

Petra: Since the exams are finally over, I think we should organise a Harvestfest party for everyone!

Michael: Why not.

We worked hard for this. Usually, it's Emy who organises these types of parties, I'm sure that if she wasn't stuck at work she would have the same idea this time too.

So we chose the music, picked up the (vegetarian) turkey, and invited our friends from the other dorms.  All we had to do was wait for dinner to finish cooking and for all the guests to arrive when Emy finally returned back from work. She looked quite gloomy when she walked in, but the moment she understood what was going on she gave a big sincere smile. I really hope this came as a nice surprise to her.

Emma: No way, is that a Harvestfest turkey?

Petra: A tofu one, to be precise. After all that hard work, we thought it was time to have some fun! 

Emma: That seems like a great idea! Do you need a hand?

And so, shortly after, the party began.

Michael: This was a party we really needed! And the “turkey” is delicious!

Petra: Um…

I think ours was the most crowded dorm on the whole campus tonight, everyone seemed to be here. Modestly, I received quite a few compliments for organising it so quickly, too.

Petra: Hey, hello Sonia, so you made it!

Sonia: Yeah, but I can't say the same about Laurine the Lobster, I didn't make it in time to get the costume from my dorm...

Petra: We'll get over it. The others are in the free time room playing juice-pong. Would you like to join them?
Sonia: How can I say no to juice-pong?

Emma: I can't say I'm good at this, but if you need an extra player...

Sonia: Your friend is brave for playing juice-pong with them, I lost the champion title to them twice already!

Petra: What, really?

Is Haruka really good enough at juice pong to compete with Sonia, really? Well, that's a surprise.

Sonia: Jokes aside, congrats on finishing your last semester! What do you plan to do now?

Petra: For the moment, I'm remaining nearby. There is a company collaborating with the engineering department that is hiring a lot of people for a massive CO₂ capture project.

Sonia: Cool! And what about your friends, are they remaining too?

Petra: They're both planning to continue working on things related to their thesis, so yes.

Sonia: I see. I'm glad you're all remaining in this region, instead of moving back to Sim City. However, I was wondering...

Sonia: Recently you've been spending all your time with your roommate, did we miss any news?

Petra: (embarrassed) What? N-no, we're just good friends. That's all.

Sonia: Sorry, but looking at you two, it just seemed like… Oh well, never mind, I've probably already asked too much.

Petra: Um… Is it that obvious?

Sonia: Pretty obvious, yeah.

I didn't think Sonia would notice, but that's it. To be honest, this stupid crush keeps bothering me more and more these last few months, instead of cooling down as I hoped for. I tried to convince myself for a long time that it was just some silly childish thing but, after all this time, I'm afraid I have to admit that hasn't been the case.

Sonia:  (whispering) Do you plan to tell her?

Petra: (whispering) What? No way!

Sonia:  (whispering) Oh, I see. She's straight.

Petra:  (whispering) ... Most likely.

I used to have no doubts about this point, I was certain to be off Emy's radar. But now… She never went back to the conversation we had a long time ago, before all the Selvadorada fever mess, when we talked about orientations and she appeared way more uncertain than I could have ever imagined. Since then we never returned back to that topic, yet she's telling me even more often than before how happy she was to be my best friend, while seeking endless hugs I struggled to see as just friendly. Most likely I was overanalysing it, but I couldn't avoid thinking something seemed off...

Petra:  … Let's say I'm 90% sure. Maybe 95%, even. 

Sonia: (thoughtful) Uhm, I see…
Petra: ...
Sonia: Also, it looks like the juice-pong match is over.

Emma: Ouch, they totally destroyed us...

I didn't really follow that match, but I remained astonished when I realised how upset Emy was. Was Haruka really that strong?

In any case, the moment I noticed Emy was about to leave quietly, I decided it was time to leave too.

Petra: I'm sorry, but I think it's time for me to go. 

Sonia: Sure. In any case, here it comes my turn to take back my juice-pong champion crown!

Emma: C'mon...

Emma: Why am I such a mess?

When I reached Emy in our bedroom, she was complaining at the fortune cube we found at the canteen a few months ago. I started to suspect the reason why she was so upset wasn't the juice-pong match, but then what could the problem be? We didn't have to worry about the exams and the thesis anymore, what was worrying her up to that point?

Petra: (cautiously) Are you all right? 

Emma: Not really...

Petra: Wanna talk about it?

Emma: Uhm...

Petra: So, what happened?

Emma: Do you remember Damian, my classmate?

Petra: (perplexed) Ehm, more or less... You dated him a few times during the first year, right?

Emma: Uhm. We had another couple of dates in the last few weeks. Well, more than dates they were the coffee breaks we get at the hospital, but that's not the point...

Petra: ...

Emma: I tried, I really did. I mean, he's objectively a very nice person, on paper he is everything I should be looking for. Yet... I just couldn't, I can't like him at all. And now I feel like an idiot.

Hearing her talk about her past dates is always tough, but it's even harder to see her so upset. I had to say something, at least try to.

Petra: Emy, I'm so sorry it didn't work out... But it's just this one guy, there isn't anything wrong with considering him like just a friend. I mean-

Emma: (frustrated) I know, I know. But this keeps happening over and over, no matter what I do. I thought a lot about it, trying to understand what may be wrong with me... But, at this point, I think I just don't like men. Like, not at all. To be honest, whenever I tried to go out for a date I always felt like I would have rather, I mean...

Emma: ... I'd rather be back to the dorm, with you. But this doesn't make sense, right? I mean,I should have realised it much sooner if I... (blushing) if I actually liked you, right?

She said it in a whisper and then looked away, but I heard that loud and clear. I've always been bad with words, for a moment I felt like I totally forgot how to speak.

Emma: (ashamed) I'm sorry, Petra... I don't even know why you should stay and listen to my nonsense, I'm just-

Petra: You don't have to apologise! It's just that, I mean...

There was so much to unpack, I didn't realise this is what was going on in her mind, nor I knew what to do.

In retrospective, what I should have told her is that it's normal not to have everything figured out already, that she didn't have to feel bad and blame herself for any of this, and that she didn't need to apologize to me either. These words sound so neat while writing them down, don't they, my dear diary? But managing to say it out loud at the right moment was another matter.

When she turned to me, instead, all she saw was me blushing all the way up my ears, as I pathetically tried to put together an intelligible sentence. I was sure she noticed because, well, it's hard to miss it when my usually green face turns red. 

Emma: P-Petra, is something wrong? I'm sorry, I didn't want to embarrass you, really! I shouldn-
Petra: It's not your fault, really! It's just that what you said came as quite... flattering, in a way. 
Emma: Oh. 

I don't know if it was the silly sentence I managed to say or the way I said it, but somehow she seemed to understand what was going on through my head. I hadn't planned to tell her about my crush for her today, in particular not after starting that conversation, and it seemed like such a pathetic way to do so too. Yet, she didn't seem upset at all.

Actually, she was smiling again, and looked a bit more relieved too when she said:

Emma:  Oh my... It really is complicated, isn't it?

We ended up talking a lot tonight, too much to report everything on a page. And, after the secrets we were the most scared to disclose came out for the first time, the atmosphere lightened a lot and it became incredibly easy to continue too.

Realising that nothing bad was going to happen for sharing what we were hiding, we soon started to joke and laugh together. I don't even remember well what we were saying, just that she's so pretty when smiling...

And I guess she felt the same way about me, considering it was her to eventually kiss me for the first time.

I feel like the happiest idiot on campus right now.

Even if someone had asked me to hypothesise the most unlikely scenario I could think of, I wouldn't have gone remotely close to this. 

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That Harvestfest completely changed my view of that last hellish semester, and the day of the graduation party was the happiest I've spent at university. 

The day started off great with the announcement of our final grades:

And it continued even better with the proclamation ceremony:

Everyone had come, from our families to our friends, and that last day on campus was a big party for everyone.

Mom, my brothers and even Diego had a lot of fun, and I have to admit we really went wild with the silly selfies this time. Well, it will be a nice addition to the family photo album, I'm sure about it!

The only picture I'm keeping to myself is this last one.

For the moment we hinted something about what happened to Mike, and only because it felt so weird to keep secrets with him after all we passed the last few years. 
As for everyone else instead, we need the time to still figure out a lot of things before sharing any news. We don't have any reason to rush it, nor do we want to receive any pressure from our families of friends. Don't you agree, my dear diary?

Next chapter -->

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§HermioneSims§ corner

The chapter was already extra long, but yup, I have a few extra comments to make too! I'll keep it short, I promise! So here are my considerations:

1) Clearly the star here was Emma. I studied quite a lot before writing a chapter like this one, yet I consider it as one of those where I risked the most to write something wrong or problematic without realising it. If you notice some major issue, feel free to point it out. 
2) I consider the evolution of this chapter quite rushed. Or, better, very rushed, this would have deserved to be spread over several chapters. There is just too much going on in this generation, fitting in a complex romantic storyline wasn't easy at all...

3) Related to the previous, this outcome could seem like a quite banal plot choice for a generation like this one. Yet, again, adding even more characters at this point would make the plot way too intricate for a legacy, so here we are.

For the rest, we'll see how this evolves in the following!