Chapter 5.21: Dialogue

§HermioneSims§ corner

To close the little parenthesis I opened at the end of the latest chapter, the one about what pronouns to use for Techna the robot, I want to recall in here that in the forum thread the "they/them" option won. Thus, from now on those will be Techna's pronouns (if you see me write anything else it's just one of my many grammar and translation mistakes).

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From Cassy's diary

Lately our work is getting harder and harder, both Venus and I always come home more tired than the day before.

As you may have guessed from the space suits we're wearing, my dear diary, we're allowed to explore space again. 

Rare elements are essential for the functioning of many technological devices that we use every day, but here in New Sixam they are practically unobtainable and the prices on the terrestrial market are crazy to say the least. Since we cannot create new elements, not even with the matter recomposer, the task entrusted to us at the space exploration centre remains the identification and extraction of as many rare elements as possible, but the number of boring balls of iron and rust we come across every day is so demoralising...

Yet we hear people talking about the ongoing resources shortage almost everyday, we can't give up just yet. 

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From Venus's diary

Our job is very tough recently, but life at home can be quite chaotic as well. Time just seems to fly by in the blink of an eye! And the speed at which days are passing is especially evident with the kids, would you ever believe it's already time to organize Halley's birthday party, my dear diary?

Everyone always says that she mostly resembles Steve, but in my opinion she looks a lot like me too. What no one really expected, though, was that she would have needed to wear glasses to correct her myopia, yet here she is.

At least she doesn't seem at all worried about the risk of breaking her new glasses while playing. She's at least as wild as her cousin Sirio, they'd spend all day climbing the little gym we have in the garden. I told you she also took after me, didn't I?

Meanwhile, Techna is also quickly befriending us all. Whoever programmed their artificial intelligence is really good at it, they really answer any question in a very similar manner as a real person would. They seem to get along especially well with Sirio, we often find them talking to each other somewhere in the house.

Techna: Oh, you got the note right this time!

Sirio: See? I knew I could do it!

But, despite everything, Techna still seems to need a lot of tuning. To be honest, they often run into real mechanical failures, so Steve has to check on their functioning practically every day.

Sirio: But will you fix them quickly, won't you?
Steve: Don't worry, it's a matter of minutes!

Techna is also programmed to help us with chores like cleaning the house. Their resemblance to us in those moments is impossible to ignore, they actually seem to find bathroom cleaning just as boring as we do.

The other presence that is becoming a constant in our house is Toq. Unexpectedly, during these last months he decides to come more and more often, and now he shows up here at least three times per week.

Both Cassy and Sirio seem quite happy to have him around so often but, until proven otherwise, I live here too and I want to express my opinion on the matter as well.

Venus: Hi Toq!
Toq: (serious) Hello, Venus.

He constantly has that flat expression, it's impossible for me to understand what he may be thinking below all those tendrils.

Venus: I know it's none of my business, but... I mean, lately you're practically spending all your afternoons here, are you planning to move here or anything similar?

Toq: (Perplexed) No.

Talking with him can be very distracting, I never know whether he's answering my questions or to the thoughts he seems in my head. In either case, I can't do much more than talk as normal and hope to receive a comprehensible answer, and so I do.

Venus: So what's on your mind? You're always with Sirio, but you don't even ask him to call you "dad", while with Cassy you act as a friend as if nothing bad had ever happened, but this isn't normal! What are they to you, a pastime until you find of something else to do?

Toq: (Perplexed) No, of course not.

Venus: Do you at least realize that they consider you as part of the family? Do you even know what this means?

He stared at me for quite a while with that indecipherable expression, before answering me saying:

Toq: ... Why are you telling me all these things, Venus?

Venus: (exasperated) Because being a parent should also come with responsibility, which you clearly aren't able of! Cassy and Sirio would need someone they can trust in their life, not someone who just keeps playing pretending to be a dad when having some free time to spend with them! By keeping behaving this way sooner or later you will just end up making them suffer again for your fault, don't you realize it?

Toq: ... It is not my intention to cause them any suffering. Not at all.

And at that point I threw in the towel, I just couldn't communicate with him. From what I'd seen up to that point I could even believe him when he said he didn't want to hurt my sister or my nephew, but I just can't help but fear that one day or another some of his weird behaviours might make him disappear again...

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From Cassy's diary

Quite a lot of time passed since my last notes, now Toq visits us almost every day. Actually, so that the store where he works is close to Sirio's school, we decided to ask him to pick up the kids after school and return back home together. So far this arrangement seems to be working quite well, actually.

Sirio is waiting impatiently to meet him every day and, if I have to be completely honest, I have to admit that I enjoy seeing him around the house and being able to talk to him too. Also because, after all his time, I'm learning what kind of questions to make him, and he's learning to answer in a clearer and clearer way, and this is very convenient, considering that we both still have many perplexities to solve.

Toq: Are you sure that my presence here every day may be considered appropriate?

Cassy: (perplexed) Sure, why shouldn't it be?

Toq: Lately a lot of people have been repeating that to me. They tell me that I am just playing family with you and Sirio. And while they are saying it, they also think that I'm being wrong in doing what I'm doing.

Cassy: You shouldn't listen too much to my sister's rants, she's being a bit too exigent I think...

To be honest, she was very often arguing on those same topics also with me, she's very worried about us. I mean, I see her points, Toq's way of being a dad is very uncommon, to say the least, and at this point it's clear also to me that it would be very naive on our side to expect him to behave like any other New Sixamian. But would it really be a fair expectation, I wonder?

I mean, it's obvious that Toq and the other ancient Sixamians would behave very differently from us, they grew up in such a different environment, and they also experience their surroundings from a quite different point of view thanks to their telepathy. I think it's obvious that his perspective of the world is different from ours, and I find it just as obvious that this will affect also the choices he makes. I accepted this idea quite some time ago and this is making it so much easier to communicate with him, I would really like my sister to understand it too. 

Cassy: Both Sirio and I appreciate your presence a lot, I think that's the most important point. 

Toq: ... I see. 

This said, we returned back to the chess game and to our thoughts. 

Even after peeping through his memories I still have so many questions, I feel like I'm just starting to understand him. 

Well, by now I think it's quite clear that he's not the emotionless person that others think he is, he's just that before arriving on Earth has never had the opportunity to learn how to externalize what he feels. I'm also beginning to suspect that his apparent apathy may be exacerbated by his telepathy, what's the point of wasting so much energy with expressions and words when everyone else around you is able to grasp what you are feeling directly by looking in your mind?

Toq: It's the first time I've seen you distracted during a chess game.

Cassy: I have a lot to think about, you know.

Just as it must be difficult for him to get used to interacting with people who don't communicate through telepathy, I too often forget that trying to divert the conversation with him is totally useless. Unlike in the past, however, in these cases he cautiously addresses my perplexities by simply saying:

Toq: If you have any questions about my telepathy, you can just ask me.

Cassy: Well, I actually have a few questions... For example, since you ancient sixamians are so good at reading minds, did you need to talk out loud to each other?

Toq: (thoughtfully) I suspect you may be overestimating our telepathic abilities. Only the original sixamians were able to only communicate with telepathy, actually they did not have a mount with which talking in the way you would intend it. For us, however, other people's minds are often too, how to say... too noisy, or even chaotic for efficient communication. Talking is often the most direct way of communicating with each other, especially when it comes to interacting clearly with a group of people.

Cassy: I see...

He then looked at me in a way that made it clear he knew I had another question lingering in my mind, ready to be said out loud. So, before he could ask me again if I had any other question, I just said:

Cassy: What about the mental overload, instead? I'd never heard anything about it before reading your memories, but it seems pretty bad!

This time he hesitated a few moments before answering, the topic seemed to make him quite uncomfortable. But not so uncomfortable to avoid the question, either. 

Toq: ... It is a very uncommon phenomenon which occurs to us when our cerebral activity surpasses a certain threshold. But you do not have to worry about that, Cassiopeia. 

Cassy: Why not? From what I was able to see, it hurt you quite a lot. Are you sure that by spending time with us you don't risk triggering it again, for example?

Toq: (thoughtful) At first I was not sure about the entity of the risk either, but I have spent quite a lot of time with you and Sirio at this point, and I did not notice any worrisome signs. We do not have any previous data on environments like this one to take as a reference, but if I had to make a hypothesis I would say that negative emotions generally have a worse effect on us than positive ones. They can, how to say... pile up and become worse and worse.

Cassy: (thoughtful) I see... It would have sense, actually. Anyway, while we are on topic... Even if it is unlikely, in the case you suspected it may happen again, could you please...

Toq: (reading her mind) ... tell you and Sirio, of course I can. 

He then hesitated a bit, before adding:

Toq: ... I am sorry for having been away for so long. But I do not have any intention to leave without an explanation again, you do not have to worry about it, Cassiopeia. 

Cassy: I see... Thanks Toq, really. 

I don't think he really needed to say it out loud, after all the time he spent with us lately it was quite clear both to me and Sirio that he wasn't planning to leave again. Thinking about it, in a few months we will reach the point where the time Toq has spent with us after returning back to our lives will equal the one he spent away from us, it's crazy to think so much time passed already.

However, being reassured out loud in that way is always well appreciated.

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